One of my readers in the UK has requested that I do a post about the bad stuff. He says I’m making Australia look like paradise and it’s making him depressed. He needs cheering up, but he’s read about….
• Cheaper houses
• Cheaper petrol
• No problems parking
• Free parking
• Bigger houses
• Cheaper houses
• Hot and sunny
• Under crowded beaches
• Open roads
• Schools with fields
He wants to hear about some bad things. Perhaps I have been a little one-sided. Australia is a big place, bad things do happen here. We have lots of bad stuff like
• Sharks
• Spiders
• Snakes
• Crocodiles
• Deadly sea creatures
• Dangerous sunlight
• Extreme weather conditions
• Rolf Harris
Rolf Harris and Friends
So, starting next week, I will be adding an “Australia’s Bad Things” category. I had hoped that this would be a happy blog. I wanted my message to be all about how great it was to move to this fantastic land. I was hoping to inspire people to make that big leap, to take that incredible step and move to the other side of the world. I wanted people to feel my happiness at living in the land of the lucky.
But it seems I am just cheesing some people off! You just can’t please all the people can you?
So look out for next week when I introduced misery to Bobinoz.
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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
Serious question this Bob, flies, what is the REAL story on the fly situation? Australian documentaries on TV often refer to the fly population (yeah and the hat with the corks thing for defence). Is this maybe another part of Australia?
Cheers Mate, keep em coming.
Phil
Aah, patience, patience. Flies will be covered within Australia’s Bad Things. The pace of life is a bit slower down here mate, but I will sure get around to it. Meanwhile, here’s a clue. A very dear friend of mine made me a hat with corks and gave it to me at my leaving party. It is way, way more irritating having corks bouncing around your face than dealing with flies. More later.
Problems with Australia:
1. Entertainment : TV is the most entertaining thing in Australia. Statistically Australians spend the most time watching TV. That says something about the place.
2. Food: Food quality is not as good as Europe or US and the variety is not that good either. A lot of foods don’t make it through their customs. Food also is very expensive. You get more bang for your buck on food in the US to Europe.
Beef products are about the only reasonably priced items.
3. Transport: The large city traffic is not that good. Bangkok has better traffic flow in peak hour than Sydney or Melbourne. Public transport is poor overcrowded and dangerous.
4. People: Friendly people-Not in the cities that is. Rural Australia has some of the friendliest down to earth people you would come accross. However, the large cities are cold emotionless places. A rural Australian person sumed up the Aussie cities for me: “People in the cities suck lemons and would not piss on a stranger if they were on fire.”
6. Work: Work is easy to find in Australia but with very limited fields. Services seems to be the biggest employer, manufacturung is dead and also any RD that goes with it. Agriculture is dying, and mining seems to be the biggest gig in town after cutting hair, clearing blocked “dunnies” and painting a fense. The good news is you can make money even though the work may not be very fulfilling.
7. Houses: The houses are bunkers for the local population. The population that attract there seem to prefer low density living, very paranoid about neighbours viewing them in a nuddy in the backyard. The good part of the houses is the space, the bad part is that if you want to go somewhere you rarely walk. the southern areas are cold and the houses are not built for it. Water is also a big problem. the whole place seems to be short of water.
8.Health care: They have a good health care system for the general population, although a bit too perastroker, definatly not a good place to be with a non- life threating problem without private health insurance but that is the same for emost places.
Security: Not that good, I feel safer in Asia than Australia. The place has a lot of agro. I suspect they have more punch-ups in Melbourne or Sydney than London. Maybe it is a function of the competitive nature they have about sport. But Australias love a bit of “Biffo”. They been also doing a bit of racial bashing lately. A number of bashings ended in deaths and a lot of racial tension, so it is now becoming a public social issue.
When I lived in Melbourne I go my house broken into and my car broken into, but the locals say that is normal for the cities to happen every now and then. Just make sure you are insured.
Overall, my accessment of places to live will depend on how much money you have:
With No Money the best place to live is Australia or Canada (if you don’t mind freezing you hinnie off).
With a moderate amount of money the best to live is Brazil or Thailand
With an extreme amount of Money the Best Place to Live is the US or France
Hi Anthony
Sounds like you’re not an OZ fan. But you are very, very funny. We should go for a beer sometime.
Obviously I disagree with all of your comments, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t enjoy reading them! If you look around this blog, I think you’ll find I’ve already covered my angle on all of your points, so I won’t repeat here.
But my favourite, without doubt, is number 1. TV the best entertainment in Australia? If I wanted to stay in watching TV all day, I’d have stayed in England. They have much better programs!
But instead, I go to the beach, I go camping, I go to any one of the many outdoor events put on by the communities all around me or I go for a picnic somewhere beautiful. Most important, I spend loads more time with my wife and daughter and my friends than I ever did in England.
And it’s much more fun.
Oh, and another thing. I’ve had 3 free bus rides (actually 2 free bus rides and one free tram ride, none of which were dangerous) in just the last year. All from friendly “city” drivers. So I think Aussies, city and rural, ARE friendly. Never had a free ride from any kind of public transport in England in nearly 50 years.
Nice try, but I’m not buying it. Love it here.
Cheers
Bob